shamanicheart–First off, thanks for stopping by! Tradition vs. Unverified Personal Gnosis can lead in some unwanted fireworks, that’s for sure! Since it’s impossible to prove, beyond a universal doubt, something any spirit or other being has said, people generally fall back on tradition to protect them from the perceived threat of Sacrilege, or People Who Use Belief to Control Others. As for me, while I want to respect Tradition, even when it isn’t my own, I can’t deny things that keep whacking me over the head.

Ash–Indeed, it was!

Finn–Hindsight’s 20/20, hey? Now that I’m home and recuperating, I’m finding that I have more breathing room than I expected. I feel like I’m fighting less, and flowing more, as though I’m in better alignment with what I’m supposed to be doing.

Acacia–Unfortunately, there are a lot of people like that. It’s one thing to have had contact with a community, and to accurately present yourself in that context. It’s another to say you are what you really aren’t, even when you know better. Of course, who IS and who ISN’T is often a bone of contention. While I talk about cultural appropriation sometimes, I do realize that even in the same culture/community you have people who have widely divergent opinions on “outsiders” using traditional knowledge and other implements. At this point it’s just not worth it to sit and worry about whether so-and-so will say such-and-such about me using the “S” word. I have things that I need to do, and worrying is a waste of energy.

sara–Which was a good entry

Sheta–Yup. Any time someone actually takes the time to see what I am doing,without coming in with a bunch of biases, it’s appreciated. I don’t always do that myself, and I need to remember to do so more often. I’m an opinionated person, and while I’ve managed to curb it somewhat, my opinion still sometimes gets in the way. Not that I can’t ever have a negative opinion, but I have to learn to approach things more openly.

Maybe I’ll do a shamanism and UPG article for the Beltane issue.

As for talking, email is best–I’m not a big fan of phones for numerous reasons.

Having been victim of this sort of dismissal by others, I appreciate you saying this. I try hard to be fair, open, and to reserve judgment until I know as much as I can about someone else’s situation (though I do have BS alarms, too, that can sway that if someone doesn’t appear to be discerning), and I appreciate equal respect. When someone takes the time to learn what I am doing and how it came into play, before passing judgment, it means a lot.

there seems to be an underlying current of sneering at UPG, especially where it deviates from “known quantities”. There’s also a strong adherence to books and established traditions as being superior, to the point where I think sometimes experiential evidence is downplayed to the detriment of all involved.

Thank you!! I think an article needs to be written on this very perspective. I agree 100%, and it’s something I have addressed in my manuscript already. You should consider doing said article.

It’s time to stop trying to prove my authenticity.

You continue to impress me. I truly admire your dedication to stopping your own internal bullshit, no matter the cost on the surface. I really, really like what you’re doing, and you have grown so much since we first met. It’s remarkable and, again, admirable.

Maybe this is not the best time to say this, after my gushing probably sounds like flattery (and it’s not), but I’d welcome getting to know you better. Email, chat, phone — whatever is comfortable for you. I know you’re busy (as am I), but as it’s not likely we’ll meet in person very soon, I can make time if you can.

I know I recently posted a bit of snark about someone I felt was using the name of shamanism and totems in a way that felt really wrong to me, but I hope you understand that I see you as lightyears away from someone like that. My issue was not that she was not racially indigenous, but that I felt she was disrespecting the very concepts she was claiming to uphold while profitting from that claim.

To me it is not so much about needing to prove any kind of legitimacy, but honesty and authenticity of intent. I use this measure for myself as well.

you need to be a neoshamanic apologist to have integrity in my book. I already see your integrity.

“It’s time to stop trying to prove my authenticity.”

Timely words for me. Thanks.

I also recently had an experience where I was deliberately told to “let go and let gods.” I had worked myself into thinking about too much structure, and subsequently, I found myself trapped in a corner, trying to figure out where I went next. And then, all of a sudden, I was told, with certainty, that I was going about it in the wrong way, and that I needed to stop.

Needless to say, I was pretty sulky about it for a while, but now, I find myself *incredibly* relieved. I’m not pressuring myself to “incorporate this” and “answer for that” or “put that in here; you need this!”–the lessons come as they will. And boy have they been coming. The most important lesson so far is this: I thought I was getting “to the core” of my religious practice by determining structure and all the trappings, but in fact, I was really avoiding it, and avoiding myself, and my true heart.

Now I’m really facing myself, and though it’s been very intense emotionally, I am coming away from it feeling like I really have reached “the core”–not of my practice, but of myself.

Which is, I suppose, the whole point.

our culture (in 21st century shamanism) our elders say “do not ask me…ask spirit…this is so up against old ways…

I SAY, look into my heart. read my intentions. ask the people who come to me for healing and see what these say…

and you?

Let me be the first to say YAY to this sentiment. Part of why I filter my esoteric posts and also don’t post a lot of what I experience lately is because I want to focus more on the doing rather than the reporting. And often times those experiences are personal, as in meant for that individual alone.

Don’t be afraid to spread your wings. Or fall flat on your face either. They’re both going to happen, and it’s like learning to walk. You have to do both if you’re really going to learn it.